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by bigbadbob from Long Island NY

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Once again we all look forward to the Christmas trees at Rockefeller Center and RexCorp Citibank Plaza in Uniondale.  It kicks off the holiday season.  And once again….there’s more. 

As I stated last year, the most fabulous trees of all are “DEE’S TREES”!!  For those out there who don’t know what  “DEE’S TREES” are, let me elaborate.  They are Christmas trees from “DEE’S NURSERY” of Oceanside, Long Island.  What makes them so special is that this will be the fifth year that Dee’s Nursery will be sending more than 400 Christmas trees to our troops in Iraq!  To me, this is the true spirit of CHRISTMAS!  As I mentioned in the past, they are not alone in this endeavor.  It all starts when many local citizens and businesses donate a lot of money to get this thing rolling, as well as Dee’s many suppliers.  Their combined efforts make it possible to bring the holiday spirit to the brave men and women, sons, daughters, mothers,  fathers who put their lives on the line on a daily basis to protect us and our freedom. If we can’t bring them home for the holidays, Dee’s brings the holidays to them.   It all started when  Dee’s, with the help of long time customer, Jim Adelis, were able to put it all together.  He was the key person in making all the arrangements with getting DHL and the Police Departments involved.   DHL donates the freight and The New York City and Nassau County Police Departments all chip in to help.  The Port Authority Police provide an escort for the convoy from Dee’s in Oceanside to JFK.  There, the trees are loaded on to transport planes and flown to Iraq.

Once again you can catch it on Fox5’s Good Day New York! The date is Dec. 8th 2008    The entire family at Dee’s works hard 12 months out of the year and yet they found the time to make this all happen.  My family and I are PROUD to call them our friends and neighbors.    YES VIRGINIA, THERE IS A SANTA CLAUS…and his spirit is alive and well at “DEE’S NURSERY”!!!!

IN ADDITION... 

I received this information from fellow MyFoxphilly blogger gunpowderNlead.  I thank her and think it should be included in this blog!   When doing your Christmas cards this year, take at least one card and send it to the address below.  If we pass this on and everyone sends one card, think of how many cards these special heroes, who have sacrificed so much, would get.

When  you are making out your Christmas card list this year, please include the  following: Holiday cards should be mailed to:


Holiday Mail for Heroes

P.O. Box 5456
Capitol Heights, MD. 20791-5456

All cards must be postmarked no later than Dec. 10. Cards should not be mailed or delivered to Walter Reed Army Medical Center.

For more information, visit www.wramc.amedd.army.mil or www.redcross.org/holidaymail for Holiday Mail for Heroes program guidelines.  Walter Reed is not accepting mail addressed to "A Recovering American Soldier."
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Looks like New York Mayor, Mike Bloomberg is planning to seek a third term as Mayor!

I guess our financial situation is a lot worse than we thought, when one of the wealthiest men in the world, wants to hold on to his job!!

  

With the world in the middle of a financial fiasco, software billionaire, Charles Simonyi is planning a second trip into outer space to the International Space Station in 2009, again in a Russian rocket with another Russian crew. 

Sort’a makes you wonder if he Knows something that we don’t. An interspace version of “HOUSE HUNTERS?” 

 

Sharon Stone has lost custody of her son to her ex-husband. It seems that she over reacts to many medical issues. She believed that he had a spinal condition, that turned out to be constipation, and wanted her son to have Botox injections for a foot odor problem. Kinda Weird, huh? 

Here’s some advice from BBB…A Bran muffin once in a while for the first problem.  Dr Scholls foot soap and odor eaters for the feet. Somehow I don’t think getting any medical advice from her is wise, it appears that she has bad “BASIC INSTINTS!” 

 

With the Vice Presidential debate on Oct. 2, between Beiden and Palin.. I’m a little nervous… 

With all those pictures of Sarah Palin holding automatic weapons, a word to Beiden, I hope that he doesn’t stand on any floor pad behind his  podium that has the words "SPRING” written on it! 

 

I hope the Bail Out works, if not our entire country could be contestants on next seasons…

”SURVIVOR!”

 

 

 

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Nichole Kidman said that she thinks swimming in the waters of a small outback town during the filming of her latest movie “Australia” is what caused her to get pregnant with her daughter…

No,  read the manual Nichole…making love is what caused you to get pregnant!

 

According to The NY Post, Tim Donahy, the dirty rouge NBA official,  will be changing from referee stripes to prison stripes for pocketing up to thirty thousand dollars a year for supplying illegal gambling scheme game tips.

Tim, I got  a tip for ya.  In prison, you should keep your back to the wall to guard against “FOULS”….if ya get my drift!

 

Bravo is bringing PRIME TIME POLO to TV. Why?

What’s next? Giveaways like “MALLOT DAY”….“BOBBLE HEAD HORSES?”

 

According to Page Six, Hugh Hefner’s female empire is finally dwindling. Some of Hef’s Harem, have been spotted with pro athletes and other young studs!

So all that means to me is that this 82 year old, man who has his own idea of working out, is gonna have to break in some new Bunnies!

 

 

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   I thought that United Airlines Flight 93 deserved a separate space, but was just as much a part of the tragedy of 911. Little did the brave passengers and crew realize that when they took off from Newark International Airport headed for San Francisco that their flight would be hijacked by four Islamic terrorists. They breeched the cockpit, overpowered the pilots and took control of the plane. Several passengers and crew members made telephone calls learning about the attacks on The World Trade Center and The Pentagon. As a result, the passengers decided mount an assault against the hijackers and take back the plane.  

   The plane crashed in a field outside of Shanksville PA, killing all 44 people on board including the hijackers. It is believed by doing this they prevented the aircraft from hitting their target, either The Whitehouse or The US Capitol. If they hadn’t sacrificed their lives, who know just how much worse it could have been?!?! 

 

              To those Slimy, cowardly, Devils Disciples ,

                          YOU WILL   PAY!!

 

                  To those BRAVE people on Flight 93….

                  

                          THANK YOU AND..

                      “GOD BLESS AMERICA!”

 

 

 

 

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    I was just getting ready to take my daughter to the doctor when she said, “hey dad…guess what? A plane just flew into the World Trade Center!” I said, “Are you serious?” “I’m serious. It’s on the news now.” I couldn’t believe my eyes. We were both totally shocked and called my wife by cell phone on our way to the doctor. She knew I would not kid about something like that and turned on the radio in her office. Only two weeks prior, her company finished the installation of the emergency alarm system at the WTC, and it worked. Now she couldn’t believe what I was telling her. She had men down there and immediately tried to call them on their radios and cell phones. They could not be reached.  When I arrived at the doctors office I told to everyone there what had just happened! They looked at me in disbelief, figuring that I’m always making people laugh, then they looked at my face and realized I wasn’t kidding around and that I would never poke fun at something like that.  I went behind the receptionist’s desk and turned on the TV without asking and they saw for themselves, one of the buildings was on fire, the other one not. (Yet!)

   When we got home we turned on the news right before the second plane hit. Then it happened. We watched both buildings collapse and couldn’t believe what we were seeing. NOBODY COULD!

 

Sure we felt it big time, because we lived here and knew people who worked there, but it impacted EVERYONE! You didn’t have to live here to feel the pain. My wife’s company was working there for both the World Trade Center and the Port Authority.    She knew and had dealings with many of the people who were no longer going to be there. Five of her former coworkers were working on the antenna on the second building when the second plane hit. My next door neighbor was working in the area when the buildings came down and thought his life was over. He was part of the people who were running to get away from the smoky debris. He was ready to jump in the Hudson River, to get away from it all. He retired and never got over it and is still efected by the memory.

 

   Even though it seemed surreal, it really happened.

   You don’t have to live in New York to have stories about that day. If anybody ever doubted the compassion of New Yorkers, this disproved that doubt. People from all over jumped in to help, but it would never be enough and couldn’t reverse what happened.

   This past Monday my wife and I had business with one of our lawyers. His office is on Broadway next to Trinity Church where they’ll have a memorial service on September 11 for those who were lost seven years ago on that tragic day. We’re down there a lot and always find it hard to  see the crater that was once WTC.

 

  

   We should never forget. I know I won’t!

 

  

   Out of respect for those lost, their families and friends, I will not remark about those cowardly agents of the devil who did this to hard working innocent people.

 

   I just hope that they ROT IN HELL!

 

BOB

 

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For several years I’ve been noticing a total lack of discipline in young children.  It seems that parents are allowing rude behavior in their offspring and not teaching them to respect the rights of others.  What ever happened to don’t touch that, or don’t do that, or give that back, it isn’t yours??  You know, civilized guide lines, laws if you will…teaching children right from wrong??  It’s the first step toward obeying certain laws.  People teach their pets not to do bad things, and if they do they’re punished until they correct their behavior.  When house breaking a dog or cat, if they break the rules they’re punished….when they get it right they’re rewarded.  They have to be trained, correct?  Well, so do children.  We as parents are their first teachers.  It’s up to us to show them the difference between right and wrong.  We ARE NOT their friends; we are their PARENTS…their authorities.  If they grow up exhibiting bad behavior, 99% of the time, you better believe it’s OUR fault!!!

 

BUT...You DON’T hit them, you DON’T call them names.  You TEACH them!  Why do we call it POTTY TRAINING??  Because they have to be trained to go to the bathroom.  They can’t figure it out on their own!  So then, why do some new parents stop there?  What makes you think they can figure out life at such an early age?  They have to be TRAINED!!  Don’t play in traffic…Don’t hit other children…Don’t take those toys, they don’t belong to you…Don’t touch that, it will break…Don’t be rude and talk back to your parents and other adults!  And I’m sick and tired of hearing “He’s expressing himself!” or “She’s exploring her boundaries!”  WHAT BOUNDARIES?!?!  YOU HAVE NOT ESTABLISHED ANY!!

 

 I grew up with these rules and passed them on to my daughter.  She turned out great!  In the last few years people we know would visit us and bring their kids with them.  In the summertime they would run around my yard and I’d ask them not to.  They’d ask me why not, and I’d answer because there are other people here and you might run into them but more importantly, you could trip on the lawn furniture and be seriously hurt or fall in the pool.  All I had to do was explain the consequences and they’d say “sure Bob, no problem” and still have fun without the running.  They understood that ALL ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES!

 

There was a time, however, when I didn’t have to do this, because their parents would stop them.  But not anymore!!  I truly believe that this lack of discipline, intelligent guidance, respect for others, and lessons in self-control creates the bullies of tomorrow….AND I HATE BULLIES!!!

 

 

 

 

 

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Getting old does not mean saying so long to sex, researchers said yesterday. More than three-quarters of American men 75-85 and half of women that age are still interested in sex, a University of Chicago survey found.The study of 3,000 men and women ages 57-85,  were published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine.

Now if they can just remember how and why…..MALL WALKING might take on a whole new meaning!  

 

 

Prince Chunk, that FAT cat...has a new castle. And the 44 lb.-cat's new owners will be happy to know that he's got a clean bill of health. He's just. Very fat.   I’m glad that he found a happy home!

But until he loses some weight they’ll be renting a sand-filled dumpster! I wonder if Richard Simmons makes house calls?!?!

 

 

 

 BEIJING
A 7-year-old Chinese girl was not good-looking enough for the Olympics opening ceremony, so another little girl with a pixie smile lip-synced "Ode to the Motherland," a ceremony official said — the latest example of the lengths Beijing took for a perfect start to the Summer Games.

Way to go China!  I thought the little girl who actually sang was very, very cute! I guess some things will never change!  BTW, Have ya taken a good look at some of your leaders? They’re probably ALL lip-sincing!

 

Former presidential candidate John Edwards, who won nationwide praise and sympathy as he campaigned side by side with his cancer-stricken wife, Elizabeth, admitted in shame Friday he had had an affair with a woman who produced videos as he prepared to launch his campaign.

Why don’t we cut everything out and just put HUGH HEFFNER  into office?  No surprises there. At least then we’ll know what to expect from our Chief Executive! I have a difficult time dealing with the way all these Politicians seem to order up women the way we call for a pizza delivery!

 

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New York city’s “Naked Cowboy” was cuffed and arrested for playing his guitar in San Francisco’s Union Square, against park rules.  What was he thinking? The loudest performers to date, were MIMES, and you know how loud they’re not! He showed up in court wearing his jockey shorts and a black $5,000 mink coat. The case against him was dropped on a technicality. 

I guess with all the money he saves on clothing he can afford a $5,000 coat!  I’m curious though. I wonder where he keeps his guitar pick!

Carla Bruni-Sarkozy, France’s new first lady admitted to posing for nude photos, too numerous to count. She said that she never realized just how many nude photos she did before meeting her new hubby French President Nicholas Sarkozy.

She claims that as France’s new first lady, she wants to pattern herself after our former first lady Jackie Kennedy??? NO, it sounds like to me that she’s patterning herself after the original first lady….”EVE”!!!

I wonder if she ever met THE NAKED COWBOY?!?!

The doorman who won $5 million in the lottery, hooked up with a 23 year old Swedish beauty who was charged with promoting prostitution at the strip club where she was working, Big Daddy Lou’s Hot Lap Dance Club. She said that she merely greeted customers and had no idea what was going on inside the club.

DUH! Do the math! Honey, here’s a flash for ya….Any time the words “Big Daddy”! “Hot”! “Lap Dancing”! & “Club”! are grouped together, It’s NOT  a QuiltingBee at a daycare center! If the doorman had met her before he won the lottery, she could’ve been his assistant…Can you imagine their TIPS?!?!

In Milwaukee an angry man was arrested for shooting his lawnmower with a shotgun because it wouldn’t start! He was drinking at the time. 

I’m not sure, but he might be the same guy who’s wanted for  strangling his WEED-WACKER!  Makes ya sorta wonder if as a child he ever abused his hoes! 

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According to Mattell, a new Barbie named Black Mary will be coming out in September. It looks like a sort of  S&M Barbie with black leather clothes and net stockings.

I guess an edition to her wardrobe will be a WHIP-ME-BEAT-ME-MAKE ME DIRTY TEE SHIRT!

 So now that 75 year old  Shubert President Phillip Smith has been granted a divorce from his  ex You-Tube-Tricia, he should take  his Viagra stash and try his luck on     THE BACHELOR!

Tricia will probably take her $750,000 settlement and start cruising the senior centers!

The court has overturned a $550,000 fine brought on by the US Government against CBS in the Janet Jackson Super Bowl (so called)  wardrobe malfunction, thus getting the network off the hook.

So I’m guessing that means no BOOBY PRIZE!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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A man dressed as a SECURITY GUARD followed employees into a Times Square Western Union office, pulled a semi automatic weapon, robbed them and got away with thousands of dollars!  These IDIOTS seem NOT to GRASP the fact that their being caught on VIDEO!

Wouldn't it be ironic if he was caught by an undercover cop dressed as a BANK ROBBER??

Eight people were injured at the RUNNING OF THE BULLS in Pamploma Spain.  They do it thinking that it makes them MACHO!  NO it makes you a PUTZ!!!

You wanna be MACHO? Try crossing QUEENS BLVD. at the height of the rush hour!!

So let's see...we have A-ROD and his wife filing for divorce.  The Christie Brinkley, Peter Cook fiasco. Throw Madonna and Lenny Kravits in for BAD BEHAVIOR!  Oh and have I mentioned talk of Madonna's divorce?!?!?!

Now all you need is Kevin Bacon in the mix...and you have "SIX DEGREES OF SEPARATION!!!"

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Now that a GALLON OF MILK is gonna cost  as much as a GALLON OF GAS.....I'm left with NO CHOICE! 

I'm just going to buy A COW and RIDE IT TO WORK!!!

A few weeks ago a high school student was suspended from school and not allowed to graduate with his class for giving his teacher  a  NOOGY??                                  

WOW!! One only wonders what would've happened if he had done a FOLLOW-UP WEDGIE!!!

Pam Anderson is looking to do a REALITY SHOW!      Just what about her IS REAL??                                         

I know....I know....she can call it SILICONE VALLEY!!!

And that's the way it is!

BBB

                                         

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   Three students at a Brooklyn High School, which included one Cheerleader, were suspended and barred from their graduation and may face criminal charges....for giving homemade slices of cake to teachers.  Why? Because the cake was laced with a laxitive, that's why!  Even though two of the teachers had to go to the hospital, they all survived the ordeal.  One of the teachers being interviewed said, "Sorry but this interview is over....I REALLY GOTTA RUN!"

   According to the NY Post, overweight people may be able to lose weight by sprinkling special seasoning over their food, which should cause them to eat less!  What's the big deal?  I've been doing that for years!   It's called DIRT!!

   Supposedly some fast-food chains are going to reintroduce tomatoes to their menu.  It's my guess that they made that decision when their RATS stopped dying?  Ya think?

   And now for the graduating CLASS-LESS of 2008   The NEW YORK METS.   YOU STINK!!!!  

  

 

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   This coming weekend, we'll ALL be observing, NOT celibrating Memorial Day!  Please let us not lose sight of what this day means!

   It's a time we put aside to remember all of those who have sacrificed and gave and are STILL giving their lives, so that "WE" can all live free!

   Americans should  pay homage to our brave armed forces, our kids, so that we can try to live in peace!

   Each year I buy a poppy from the Vets and hang it from my rear view mirror all year long, reminding me of their patriotic sacrifices.

   I'm not saying not to have your BBQ'S, but how about we ALL say a little prayer for them as grace before we dig in?? 

  It's the least we can do, and don't forget to pray for those troops who are stiil there and their safe return!

BBB

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   There was a time when if all you had on you was pocket change, you could still go to work and come home.  That's now ancient history. 

   There was a time when you wanted to go into the city, it was cheaper to take the railroad and leave the car home.  That's also ancient history.  

   We're constantly being bombarded with ad campaigns that encourage us to use mass transit.  How can we do that if you keep on raising the fares??  The homeless rate in Manhattan will go up, simply because people are stuck without enough money to get home!  And what about those metro cards that seemingly expire even though you still have rides left on them?  Who are these BOTTOM FEEDING Rocket Scientists  who are making the rules?? Who do they answer to?  Obviously NOT us! 

   People who live paycheck to paycheck are having a hard enough time trying to make ends meet, but at least make their commute to work affordable.  It's bad enough that taxes keep going up, the cost of heating your house keeps going up, fueling your car, paying for food, etc.... How do you expect people to get to work so they can at least earn enough to pay their bills? 

   Even though I am very comfortable and fortunately can afford the increase, that still doesn't make it right... I worry about those who are trying to eke out a living and can't keep up with the cost of living!!

   I'd love to hear from all of you about how you feel and what you think can be done about it!!  I'd also like to hear from some of the FOX FAMILY in Philly, Chicago, Boston, Houston, L.A.  about the costs of your MASS TRANSIT SYSTEMS!

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   BITE ME!!!!  It’s not HA-HA-HA!!  It’s BLEEP!-BLEEP!-BLEEP!!!  Oh, I get it now…A fat dude in a red suit, with fur trim, black boots, a gold belt buckle and covered with BLING??  It must be JOLLY OLD SANTA PIMP!!!!  What the heck is happening to people???  Have they lost their minds???  And what’s next?  “In the valley of the JOLLY, HA-HA-HA, GREEN GIANT”?  Did the soft spot in your heads never harden??

   Because of a careless, hurtful remark about some really SUPER GREAT black female basketball champions made by a cantankerous old fart over the air, who should have known better, you want us to take out the traditional BLEEP-BLEEP-BLEEP from SANTA’S BAG OF TRICKS??  I don’t think so!!  What’s next?  We’ll have to change the name of the garden tool to GARDEN HA??  “Honey, I’m gonna do some weeding, go to the shed and get me my GARDEN HA!!  Oh and while I’m there, I’m gonna water the grass, could you turn on the HA’s please??”  Or what about when the wife puts on a skirt, what does she wear under it….PANTY HA’S??

   The BLEEP’S HE was implying had nothing to do with laughter!!  In case you missed it, BLEEP-BLEEP-BLEEP is a form of laughing.  Laughing is a good thing.  It’s a lot like yawning…one person starts it and others join in…GET IT?

   For years I’ve worked with underprivileged children, whose one glimmer of hope is a visit from SANTA CLAUS.  A lot of them have very few reasons to laugh, and Santa’s BLEEP, BLEEP, BLEEP’s brings a smile to their faces, showing them that there’s hope and that people do care about them.

   Those girl athletes deserved praise, accolades and ‘atta-boys, for what they accomplished, not some low level remarks made by that careless, nasty old creep.  I’ve lost whatever respect I MIGHT have had for him.  But none of US made those ugly, hurtful remarks and shouldn’t have to alter tradition on account of him.

   To all my friends…

MERRY CHRISTMAS!! &.BLEEP! BLEEP! BLEEP!

 

Santa Bob

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bigbadbob

Professional Musician (www.freeflowingsalt.com)
/Comedy Writer/Artist/all-around-
insane-person....

Member Since: 7/13/2007