Rob_Haswell's Blog

Did you hear the story about the man who shot his lawn mower?

If not here is a short version of the Chris Goodman story on Fox 6:

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EVER BEEN SO ANGRY AT YOUR LAWNMOWER, YOU'VE WANTED TO SHOOT IT?

POLICE SAY 56 YEAR OLD KEITH WALENDOWSKI HAS, HE'S NOW IN JAIL OVER IT.

IT HAPPENED WEDNESDAY MORNING.

COURT DOCUMENTS SAY WALENDOWSKI WHO LIVES IN THIS HOUSE WITH HIS ELDERLY MOM TOOK A SAWED OFF SHOTGUN AND BLEW A HOLE IN HIS LAWNBOY LAWNMOWER.

THE CRIMINAL COMPLAINT SAYS WALENDOWSKI APPEARED TO BE INTOXICATED WHEN HE SHOT UP THE MOWER.

HE TOLD THE OFFICER, HE GOT UPSET BECAUSE THE MOWER WOULDNT START SO IN HIS WORDS, I GOT MY SHOTGUN AND SHOT IT. HE CONTINUED TO SAY I CAN DO THAT, ITS MY LAWNMOWER AND MY YARD, SO I CAN SHOOT IT IF I WANT.

WALENDOWSKI WAS CHARGED WITH FELONY POSSESSION OF A SHORT-BARRELED SHOTGUN AND DISORDERLY CONDUCT WHILE ARMED.

HE FACES SIX YEARS AND THREE MONTHS IN PRISON IF CONVICTED.

IN THE NEWSROOM, CHRIS GOODMAN, FOX 6 NEWS.

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Now first let me say this is in NO WAY ACCEPTABLE. First, owning an illegal firearm is wrong and dangerous. Second, operating a lawn mower let alone a shot gun while drunk is a VERY bad idea. And last but not least shooting anything, anywhere that someone could get hurt is incredibly stupid and illegal.

That said... tell me you haven't wanted to shoot your lawnmower or at least take a bat to it after about 400,000 pulls on that stupid cord with no results?! I have. I admit to kicking an old clunker of a mower I had more than once!

I actually don't mind cutting the grass but when the mower won't start and you're about the break your rotator cuff pulling on the start cord, it can be the most frustrating thing in the world and even a Saint would lose his temper!

My father was, um, famous for his temper. Well, famous in our family at least. He once go so frustrated with a lawnmower that wouldn't start that he threw the thing ( and I do mean threw ) into the trunk and promptly drove to the store that sold it to us to complain and get it fixed.

Dad was certain he'd been sold a clunker.   To prove i,t he dragged the salesman out into the parking lot to show him that the mower wouldn't start. Dad was so confident in the malfunction, that he decided to pull the starter with the mower still IN the trunk.

Problem was, the lawnmower wasn't broken, Dad had just flooded the engine so on the 20 min ride to the hardware store, the engine settled down and was ready to rock. Yes, it fired right up and mulched EVERYthing in our trunk. The sales guy and I jumped back and took cover. Dad just screamed, "son of a BLEEP" and turned it off.

Fortunately for all of us, the trip to the store had not only settle the mower engine, it had settled Dad's temper and after a few embarrassed moments, we all had a good laugh!  Much to my father's chagrin this story still makes us laugh when it comes up at family get togethers!

I try to remember that story when my old mower won't start to help keep my temper from leading me into an embarrassing story for the next generation of Haswell kids.