Executivemom's Blog

babylove - not saying it's the victim's fault at all..scum 100% to blame for his actions - what i'm saying is if someone wants something from you that is not worth your life - GIVE IT TO THEM...things can be replaced. People can't. Sometimes, we think we are more invincible than we are and in today's world - it just isn't worth the material goods vs our safety.
thanks for the reply

The problem here is not the girl having a purse (which giving it up certainly does make sense) but rather these animals we have roaming the streets disguised as people.

As long as our criminal justice system continues to be a revolving door placing these animals back on to the street with minimal or no prison time you're going to see more of this kind of thing happening.

A friend who recently retired after 37 years in law enforcement told me that the street is much more dangerous today than when he started due to the fact that these 13 and 14 year old thugs that you find doing these things today would just as soon kill someone as look at them. Yet today we still use the same juvenile justice system of 30 years ago where we give them a slap on the wrist and turn them loose to do it again.

Rehabilitation? It's not going to happen. Its time to start locking them up for a long long time.

Yep...just give it up. We were trained this by our corporate security staff when we worked in the city. No strong arm crime is worth your life (or a bullet).

I honestly cannot remember in my younger years (late 70's early 80's) when I ever thought of a gun being pulled on me. Heck, there were seldom fist fights then. I think the main thingback then was being called names! LOL.

Take care K!

I can sit here and say what I would have done or what I feel that young girl should have done, but I've not been faced with that situation so I really don't know. I hope I never find out either.

It's unfortunate that THIS is what our society has come to. And these are what most young kids and teenagers have to call the "good old days". It's sad.

And if they give up their purse, the thugs will just think, "This was easy, so we will just keep doing it."

Catch the thugs, find out where they got a gun, do something with the parents of these thugs. They did not teach them respect for others.

Gun owners have a back-ground check and take classes. So these thugs must have stolen the gun. Find out why their parents didn't know they had it. Or were the parents or parent sending the thugs out to steal?

Our main problem is people having children and doing nothing to raise them.

Fine the parents or put them in jail for a period of time.

You cannot leave the streets to the thugs, or else we will just have to put a big fence around the cities and call them jails.

Executivemom, do you get your pills legally?

thanks.

#1) If you're truly an "executive mom" then, chances are, you're at least age 35. But even if you're 25 the point is, you have maturity and life experience and wisdom -- and rational thinking, and intelligence born from all of this, on your side. These factors guide your actions. Those 15 year old girls do not possess these attributes -- yet. And so your perspective is very, very different from theirs -- thus, your actions given the same scenario would be very different also.

#2) The fact of the matter is, you are correct. No purse, nor car for that matter, is worth sacrificing your health and well-being for, much less risking your life. But again...

#3) If a person lacks awareness and experience and faces a high-risk situation such as this -- or any high-risk situation, be it an encounter with a thug or a too-friendly acquaintence taking sexual liberties with you, or a mother bear and her cubs you've disturbed in the woods -- that lack of awareness is going to prevent them from making a savvy and timely decision.

#4) I would be that the #1 factor causing these girls to find themselves in this situation is the fact that women, especially girls, are far more trusting of people than they really should be -- it's a sad fact but a very real reality. And

#5) With trusting too readily comes the issue of being naive, and that's a bad twosome.

#6) They were doing what a great many kids and adults alike do, especially women -- of all ages -- and seniors:

NOT PAYING ATTENTION TO YOUR ENVIRONMENT AND SURROUNDINGS -- NOT PAYING ATTENTION TO WHO IS APPROACHING YOU

#9) My field and expertise and 20+ years of professional experience is the broad area of risk management -- including personal safety and defense tactics [such as take-down and take-out (threat and risk mitigation) tactics] for women and others particulary vulnerable to being a victom of a violent crime.

The point, frankly, in some cases, I disagree with what you say -- that being the following statement: "in our seminars, the one thing we say is .... give it up - no matter what it is."

Give it up -- no matter what it is??? You have to be kidding!! Give it up -- as in give up a purse or a vehicle -- sure. Give it up. But that is not what you suggest! You are saying "Give it up -- no matter what it is."

That is potentially life-threatening bad -- very bad -- advice. Evidence shows -- including police records -- that many, many victims who fought back managed to survive -- only because they did NOT give it up.

The point being that you should ammend your sentence -- and change your seminars. Fight for your life. Fight for others' life. Armed with the right knowledge, fighting an assailant is the best strategy.

You only "give up" a possession. Not your fight for self preservation. BIG difference. Other than that, this is a good blog!

Thank you all for your points of view - cheetah - great points made...when I say "give it up" I meant (and thought I said) possessions. I agree with you and as a R.A.D. Trainer I teach women about fighting back and self defense and safety and using your Voice and a variety of other issues - over a 12 hour time period with attack simulations to follow learning. Self Defense isn't something that can be taught in a blog or by video or book - it needs to be "ingrained". I spend a lot of time with 10th graders and they are actually smarter and "more aware" than a lot of the adults I work with!
Yes, I am over 40 and you are right - my perspective and life experiences have given me a different perspective. But at 22 I did face a gun man while I was working. I turned and found a gun in my face. My hands were full. I threw my items at him as a deterrent, I threw my keys in the other direction and I ran for safety inside of Homer Phillips Hospital. Survival was instinctive over losing the car or not (which I did and all the meds I had in it). Thanks again for the wonderful points made and clarification!

OK so I'm going add something different here..

Because my 15 year old daughter and I just had a similar discussion on why she couldn't walk around the neighborhood at 10:15 at night... Because you never know what will happen. It's just not safe. I'm sure that 15 year old girl never thought she'd end up shot and in the hospital and I'm sure her mom is tearing herself apart right now for letting her daughter walk around at 11:30 at night.

The days that you could do that safely are LONG gone.

I agree with giving up the purse. But if they try to force you in the car, you do whatever you can to NOT get in the car. Once you're in the car your chances of surviving are slim to none.